Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Last Day of September

This past week was not the best. We've been very busy, just like always. Well, on Thursday evening we spent the entire night at our doctor's after-hours clinic because Kayla's foot was not getting any better so she had to have more x-rays. The doctor's thought that she may have injured her foot at the time her tibia broke because she has been limping so bad. But the good news is, her break healed great and no problems with her foot as far as the x-ray was concerned. Thursday was also the day that my online fall classes started. I am taking classes to finish my bachelor's full-time on top of everything else that is going on! So, that's been filling in any extra time I can find :) Then, my step-mom Helen's mom died, Grandma Eva, and it was so hard for my dad especially. She was a wonderful person, anyone who is responsible for raising Helen just has to be, my step-mom is one of the greatest, kindest, and best people I know. But my dad with his lung cancer, and him deciding to stop treatment, and the passing of Helen's mom, it's just not good. I hate cancer, I hate using that word in the same sentence with my dad, I hate how sick it's made him, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it. Oh and did I mention that my mom decided to divorce me this week too? We have had a difficult relationship since, hmmmm, FOREVER, and she picks this week of all weeks to tell me she does not want to see me ever again. Did I also mention that she is an alcoholic and takes pills and hates me because I won't tell her what she wants to hear all the time? I have a really hard time with her because I am the one she calls when she's drunk and crying and wants help. Noone else, and then she doesn't remember it the next day, she doesn't remember anything so when I say something, she tells me I'm a liar. Fun. I should be used to it because she does this about twice a year, but it hurts every time. Then, as if things couldn't be any worse, Kayla had an asthma attack at the funeral home on Sunday because there were so many flowers there. So, back to the doctor's yesterday morning! She has to do a preventative breathing treatment everyday now until the springtime. But the good news is, her walking improved over the weekend and her limp is almost gone. Eva's been doing so good in school and at dance, and we had a mommy/daughter shopping trip yesterday and it was fun to just spend some girl time with her. We bought a book, Tale of Despereaux, that she is going to read. I picked it because it's a Newberry Award winner, but we also found out it is going to be a Universal Studios animated movie at Christmastime this year. So Eva and I are really looking forward to reading it and then taking K-fun to see it in December. So, we've been pretty busy but I'm looking forward to a good rest of the week with my little sweethearts :) God also planted seeds in my heart this week, literally......He must really want me to meditate on his passages about seeds because it has come up in so many different ways this week. I never fully understood until this week and I didn't even realize how badly I needed to until now. I know God loves me and hasn't given up on me yet :) "If you desire the Word of God to produce in your life, you must decide to plant the Word in your heart and mind. "

2 comments:

~jen~ said...

Wow. What a week. Wow, Lisa. And I thought I was beginning to have a really doozy of a week...you blew me away. Oh I wish there something I could say to make it all go away. I sooooo feel ya on the "mom" issues...I think we've talked about that before...I go through what you went through also once or twice a year (it used to be more often but then I decided that for my own sanity and peace of mind I needed to divorce HER! LOL). A little time away doesn't hurt...believe me. When we started talking again though, I learned very quickly that I needed to keep things "superficial"...not get into things very deeply with her (one, she doesn't remember anything I say anyway, adn two, it just makes her angry when I tell her the truth). WHen she calls to vent to me about her husband or her life, I just need to listen and then without saying anything to "fix the situation" let her go. Or I just won't answer the phone... becuase I know what it's going to be about. *sigh* So I really, completely know what you are going through...alcoholics are no fun.
Man...I wish I could just have you come over and have a girl night with me but I'm afraid we'd just cry the whole time...I know I'm at my breaking point and it sounds like you may be too. I'm just digging into the Bible as much as I can right now...trying to fight that battle that goes on in my mind everyday. Things have to get better soon...right? They just have to...(((hugs)))

Lisa said...

Jen, thanks so much for your comment. I do remember that you sometimes have similar issues with your mom too. It's so hard, isn't it? I have thought the same things as you as to how to handle it, and I do that for a little while, but it just keeps happening all over again. It's like a bad movie that keeps repeating itself! I would LOVE a girl's night with you, let's do that soon. I've been reading my Bible too and trying to fill my heart with God's word so I can fight that battle too! Things WILL get better, hugs to you too, love you!

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